Why do I have everything that I desire?
Why do I live the life of my dreams?
Is it because I am loved by the Gods?
Or is it because I am the Goddess of my reality?
SL.
Sometimes I think,
Sometimes I wonder,
What happens to the rest of the world when I go under?
Does it really stop spinning?
Can I really not rest?
Even if I'm tired,
To whom should I address?
Your Honor, I'd like to sit down,
But why is it that I need your permission?
Who died and made you King?
Because surely a Queen would never do such a thing.
SL.
I decided to make this webpage on Tuesday, May 26th, 2026
Because I was feeling an itch.
Deep within my bones,
Deep within my spirit,
I needed something tangible,
Something that said
"I was here."
So, here it is.
The sound that you hear,
I produced it on my own.
I'm so proud of my mind's digital home.
SL.
Coding is actually kind of fun.
I love the fact that I can just sit at my desk and write all of this.
I love the fact that I built this website.
I love the fact that I did this.
SL.
It's been a minute since I last wrote.
I imagine it'll be like this
As I do forget to code and update.
I love it. When I remember it.
SL.
Something feels strange today.
I feel this way every once in a while.
I wonder what it is, but the answer doesn't always quite give.
Oh well.
SL.
I feel that I'm at the end of a particularly long chapter
That's at the end of a pain and heartbreak filled book.
I've learned many things.
I've sought after
The one thing that makes me swoon.
My life, my purpose.
I feel it all finally sinking in.
This is what all the pain and hardship was for;
So I could rebirth into the person writing this.
It's bittersweet, really,
Acknowledging such a major end.
Sometimes,
A small part of me wishes things could've been different.
But, alas,
This is where we are.
I must admit,
I do look forward to what is to come.
SL.
I keep coming back to this website and I'm just so proud of it.
I'm so proud of the audio, I'm so proud of the design.
Did you know I coded this site?
I'm so creative lol.
SL.
Michael Jackson is very inspiring.
I don't idolize anyone, but Michael Jackson...
Michael Jackson is something else.
His story was, is very spiritual.
The struggle, the pull between two identities;
One as part of a unit, the other as an indivdual.
Having to choose himself knowing that it'll ruffle some feathers,
Break some hearts.
It wasn't easy
But it needed to be done.
He freed himself on that stage in 1984 in front of the whole world.
Freed himself from the chains placed on him by his father.
It's all very spiritual.
He had an ongoing tower moment.
The Devil didn't want to let go,
But God was stronger.
God lived in Michael Jackson,
God spoke through Michael Jackson.
God was Michael Jackson,
Michael Jackson was God.
We are all God,
& God is all of us.
SL.
So, the author's copy of Poetic Affirmations arrived yesterday
& I retreived it from the mailbox today.
Kinda nervous to open it.
I have to make sure this site is ready to go online,
Have to buy the domain,
Have to set the sale price.
A lot of backend work goes into being a business owner.
Oh, also have to make sure the website is formatted for smaller screens.
I'm nervous kind of.
I wonder how it'll be received. Geez,
I feel good though.
Like, I'm not worried or stressed because it just feels like everything is just going to flow.
I like that.
It's taken me years to align with my path and now I have and I just-
Sigh.
I can't even say that it's disbelief because during those years,
I was being prepared for this very moment
& now it's here and I'm just like;
"Here we are, I guess."
Like it's not grand to me, it's just my life.
Two years ago I would've probably been overly excited and losing my mind
& not that there's anything wrong with being excited,
But this is literally who I am now, if that makes sense?
That's the whole point of manifestation, isn't it?
You become the one that can hold what it is that you want
& I am the one that can hold what it is that I want.
So yea, that's why there's no fear or worry or anxiety,
Because I've already been living in this reality;
The reality of the Creator of Poetic Affirmations.
It's got a nice ring to it, yea?
SL.
Ok this is just a test,
I scripted that there will be ten entries per page and I just wamt to ensure that I got it correct.
SL.
Yaaaayyy,
I did it!
SL.
Maybe it's just me but I don't really see people talk about being able to literally feel the dysregulation in your nervous system,
the anxiety, the vigilance, & the doomism,
become aware of the fact that it's all a product of a faulty environment,
& then stepping outside of it and realizing that you are literally ok.
The concept of existing in your body with dysregulation but not becoming the dysregulation,
The concept of being able to observe the dysregulation in your body and choose not to embody it despite it being there.
I hope this makes sense.
SL.
My body has been so tense for so long that it defaults to it.
I notice it the most in my thighs & then I have to physically untense-ify myself multiple times a day.
Did you know that Sagitarrius rules the thighs? I'm a Sagitarrius.
Is tensing up in your thighs due to lack of core strength?
The thighs have to support the upper body when sitting,
Is it because of poor posture?
Idk where I'm getting at here.
I need somatic therapy.
SL.
Sacral and root chakras need work but I already knew that.
Root is all about safety, grounding within the body, security, belonging.
I've never felt any of those things before in my life.
At my reiki session last year, the women said they felt such an openness in my upper chakras
But felt major blockages as they moved lower,
I'm like "yea that tracks."
Sacral is all about sexuality, pleasure, emotions, creativity, receptivity.
I'd say I've been slowly working on that one over the years,
There is unfortunately an emotional hurricane that's yet to occur but long overdue.
I can feel it.
I can only do so much in my current environment,
Right now, my focus isn't on my sacral or root chakras but on getting myself into a safe, healthy & aligned environment.
& then I'll have my emotional hurricane.
I can't wait for my emotional hurricane.
I need a good cry.
A gut-wrenching, soul deep, ground-breaking cry.
SL.
The Universe will literally not let you settle for less than you deserve.
Universe has shut every last one of my desperate attempts at settling for less than I deserve in real eye-opening ways.
I tried to meet a guy on a dating app last year,
Dude asked me about my 444 necklace and when I proceeded to explain
He called my team demons.
I was like wow lmao, heard Universe!
& I realize now that I could not give an eff less about a man right now!
LIterally a waste of my time,
I've got money to make.
Universe has been subtly telling me that a m*n is coming,
Universe, I don't want to hear about someone's male child right now.
Life of a psychic.
But seriously Universe back off for real I don't have the patience for a m*n rn.
SL.
The overwhelming feeling I am experiencing right now is acknowledgement,
Acknowledgement that I still have a whole life left to live.
Acknowledgement that it's not the end of the world,
Just the end of a life I've been living since the day I was born.
& it's bizarre to me because I've been in this season for years
& now the season is finally shifting to the next and it's just like
"Wtf is going on fr"
I've gotten so used to existing in this season,
This cocoon of transformation
That I genuinely forgot that there's a point to it;
To emerge as a butterfly
& to actually fly.
Because wdygm that I still have a whole life to live?
That I still (maybe) have to experience being 30
& I'm only 23 rn like I feel like I've lived an entire life already.
& I'm tired as shit!
I just want to sleep for days,
Hibernate. I want to hibernate.
Dude I can't believe I have a whole life left to live.
SL.
Just finished editing the unboxing video for Poetic Affirmations
I can't upload it until the price change finalizes which could take a few days, honestly.
Or maybe I can upload it cause I'm not even at 1000 followers yet
& you can't put a link in your bio before then.
Dude honestly, idk.
I feel a little ungrounded and shaky energetically cause i have this book in my hands now and
I feel like I'm overthinking how to approach it?
I know that the ungrounded and shakiness is due to what will come once everyone knows
The book is now purchaseable.
I just need to allow the energy to ground and settle,
I'm not going to rush myself.
I want to get Chick Fil A but unfortunately it's Sunday.
Chick Fil A should be open on Sundays.
SL.
I really wish Chick Fil A was open today.
I want a cobb salad with extra chicken and cheese, no bacon,
Extra roasted red pepper and tomato packs, creamy salsa and avocado ranch,
A large fry and a sunjoy.
SL.
You know what, I want to play paralives.
I'm glad the s*ms has competition because they been playing in face for too many years.
Fuck EA! why am I paying for RAIN?
Anyways, if anyone wants to buy my ea account you can. I've got a bunch of expansion packs.
SL.